Sunday, April 15, 2012

Epic Pizza Party

Who doesn't love a pizza party? (A: Jerks.) Pizza is one the greatest foods ever invented! So fun to make, especially with friends.

What you will need:  A few of your favorite pals or your favorite person, a plethora of pizza toppings (please see below for ideas), pre-made dough or ready made pizza shells or flour and few ingredients to make your own dough, and of course killer tunes and...go. Need some help?

Heavy Metal Pizza Party Playlist:
Entombed - Seeing Red (Uprising)
Darkthrone - Transylvanian Hunger (Transylvanian Hunger)
Witchery - Bone Mill (Symphony for the Devil)
Celtic Frost - Progeny-(Monotheist)
Bathory - Hades (Bathory)
Terrorizer - Dead Shall Rise (World Downfall)
Bolt Thrower - At First Light (Those Once Loyal)
Carpathian Forest - Bloodcleansing (Strange Old Brew)
Entombed -  Paranoid (To Ride, Shoot Straight and Speak the Truth)
Deicide - The Lords Sedition (The Stench of Redemption)
Motorhead- Sex and Death (Sacrifice)
Repulsion - Radiation Sickness (Horrified)
Venom - Witching Hour (Welcome To Hell)
Craft - Fuck The Universe (FTU)
Satyricon- King (Now Diabolical)
Pentagram- Be Forewarned (First Daze Here Too)
Behemoth - Ov Fire And The Void (Evangelion)
Dismember - Beyond Good and Evil (Hate Campaign)
Grave - Extremely Rotten Flesh (Into The Grave)
Watain - Dead But Dreaming (Sworn to the Dark)
Obituary - Chopped in Half (Cause of Death)
Possessed - Pentagram (Seven Churches)

80's/90's Goth/Industrial Pizza Party Playlist:

Sisters Of Mercy- Temple of Love (Erotic Dreams)
Bauhaus- Telegram Sam (In Flat Fields)
The Birthday Party- Nick the Stripper (Prayers of Fire)
Flesh For Lulu- I Go Crazy (Long Lives the New Flesh)
Cure -Fascination Street (Disintegration)
Jesus and Mary Chain- Happy When It Rains (Darklands)
Bauhaus- Silent Hedges (The Skies Gone Out)
Swans-  Love will tear us Apart (12" Single)
Joy Division- Dead Souls (Permanent)
Sioxie Sioux- Spellbound (Juju)
Nick Cave and The Badseeds- Mercy Seat (Tender Prey)
Love and Rockets- It could be Sunshine (Express)
Jesus and Mary Chain -  Just Like Honey (Psysho Candy)
The Church- Under the Milky Way (HeyDay)
Sisters Of Mercy- This Corrosion-(Flood Land)
NIN- Head Like a Hole (Pretty Hate Machine)
Alien Sex Fiends- I Walk Line (I Walk The Line)
Foeutus Bedrock- (All-Nude Revue)
Ministry- Stigmata (Psalm 69; And the Way to Suceed and To Suck Eggs)
Einsturzenden Neubauten- Futter Mein Ego (1/2 Mensch)
My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult- Sex On Wheels (Sexplotion!)
KMFDM- Godlike (Naive)
Front 242- Head Hunter (Front By Front)
Nitzer Ebb-Join In The Chant (That Total Age)
1000 Homo Dj's- Supernaut-( 12" Single)
Ministry- Jesus Built My Hot Rod (Land of Rape and Honey)
KMFDM- Light (Angst)
Frontline Assembly- Plasticity-(Plasticity)
Cabaret Voltaire- Sensoria (Micro-Phonies) 

70's/80's Punk Pizza Party Playlist:
999 - Crazy (999)
The Damned - Neat Neat Neat (Damned, Damned, Damned)
X - We're Desperate (Wild Gift
Buzzcocks - Orgasm Adddict (Buzzcocks)
Suicide - Ghost Rider (Suicide)
Ramones - I Don't Want You (Road To Ruin)
Crime - Frustration (Sanfrancisco's doomed)
Dead Boys' - Sonic Reducer (Young Loud and Snotty)
The Stooges - TV Eye (Funhouse)
Runaways - Cherry Bomb (Runaways)
Bad Brains - Attitude (Bad Brains)
999 - High Energy Plan (High Energy Plan)
MC5 - Kick Out The Jams (Kick Out the Jams)
Modern Lovers - Roadrunner (Imflammable Material)
Stiff Little Fingers - (Barbed Wire Lovers)
The Germs - Lexicon Devil (MIA)
Misfit - Angelfuck (Legacy of Brutality)
X - Los Angeles (Los Angeles)
The Jam - In The City (In The City)
The Demics - I wanna Go to NYC (Talk's Cheap)
999 - Emergency (999)
Avengers - Car Crash (Paint It Black)
Cocksparrer - Because You're Young (Shock Troops)
Vibrators - Maybe Baby (Pure Mania)
Plastic Bertrand - Ça Plane Pour Moi (Single)
The Saints - Rundown (Stranded)
The Stranglers - Peaches (Rattus Norvegicus)

Here are some of our favourite pizza recipes that will be sure to liven up any party:

1) Old Man Colohan's Pizza Pie A.K.A The Mofo (originally published in Death for No Reason Zine)

 You want to be rich, accomplished, and impress ladies, friends, yuppies and enemies alike? Alright. Here's what you need to do. Firstly, I don't measure anything and I use a magic bullet for everything. They seem like cheesy infomercial shit but they're seriously invaluable for anything you ever want to mix or purée, from dips to soups, whatever the fuck. You can get them for $30 nowadays  or even less through Craigslist. If you have the means and skills to make your own foccacia, go for it - it's flat Italian bread with olive oil and rosemary and sea salt or you can buy a good focatch' and you're gold. Alternately, you can do this on any bread or shell, but a good and oily flat bread of any kind beats prepared pizza shells.

Here's the shit you'll need:

Foccacia. Half an onion and some cloves of garlic (to taste). Sundried tomatoes (the glass jar kind in oil). Artichoke hearts (same). Cashews, a big ass bag of them (buy in bulk). Rosemary and coarse sea salt. (to taste) and whatever else you like on pizza. You should be able to do this for about $12.

1. To start you want to fry the shit out the onion and garlic. Smash up the garlic and with the side of a broad knife. Dice the onion, fry them both until it all carmelizes  (keep going on high heat till it's brown and somewhat burned) so it's nice and sweet, then purée it. If you use olive oil, watch the temperatures it'll smoke very easy- get a good lid on that sucker while frying it and turn on a fan so your neighbours don't call the fire department (screw you Bernice).
2. Dump one (metric) shitload of cashews, some olive oil, sundried tomato oil and burnt to a crisp onion and garlic (oil and all) into a blender. Mash that shit up, should be about two cups worth, That's the topping (instead if tomato sauce). If it's too thick add a bit more oil (as you can probably tell, this is not low-cal pizza).
3. The sauce should be thick but not too thick, beige looking and taste awesome. If this has been achieved, spread it on that Focatch'. If you have experienced an epic pizza fail, go back to steps 1&2. Otherwise, proceed to step 4.
4. Dress that pizza pie with sundried tomatoes, artichoke hearts and some rosemary. It should be pretty salty already if you used salted cashews but if it needs it, add some sea salt. You can add whatever else is your jams here, sweet stuff like pineapple also goes well with it but it should be really rich with the above.
5. Bake it on medium heat and keep an eye on that fuckin' wheel, you're basically just toasting it if the bread is already made, but watch because the sundried tomatoes will dry out and burn faster than the rest of it. If the edges are browned enough, go for it.  Take that sucker out. Let it cool and harden.
6. Divide, conquer, impress and get mad trim.

2) B's -The Italiano, A.K.A. The Saltoholic's Revenge

Made with Amanda (Pentabike)'s awesome pizza dough. Topped with homemade pesto (click here for recipe), sundried tomato but not the dry kind in the bag because they are way too salty. Use the ones packed in oil. Black sliced olives and artichoke hearts and mushrooms. Dress and bake until golden brown.

Serve and Demolish. 

3) CC's Yuppie Bastard Wheel (Prius Not Included)

This one's a lot like the Old Man Colohan jam above, but with more of an upwardly mobile vibe. Focaccia base, so if not actual focaccia bread and you're making the dough yourself, just add some rosemary (lots), garlic, olive oil and sea salt to it. Figs - this is the crucial topping. Get the kind that are fresh, not dried (looks like a little plum) and you only need 2 or so of them. Slice them thinly. Add those, artichokes (jarred), and from there it's your call. Here's one with tomato and sweet yellow peppers:

4) B's Sweet Basil and Spinach Delight:

Served on spelt crust and topped with homemade tomato sauce (see below), fresh basil, spinach, zucchini, plum or roma tomato, white button mushroom and Daiya mozzerella. Sprinkle fresh black pepper and garlic powder on top. Serve and Destroy!

B's Tomato Sauce Recipe:
1 can of diced tomatoes (no salt)
1/2  cup passata (You can get this at Fiesta Farms. Most Grocery stores carry it)
3 cloves of garlic
1 Large sweet onion
Handful of fresh basil (finely chopped)
1 tablespoon dried oregano
1 1/2 teaspoons of salt
1/2 teaspoon of sugar
1 tablespoon of olive oil for frying and 1 tablespoon for sauce
1 teaspoon of dried parsley

In a large sauce pan add oil and fry onions and garlic. Once translucent/brown add diced tomatoes, passata (adds a little thickness - I am  not a huge fan of tomato paste for sauce) salt and sugar. Bring to a boil then reduce to simmer, add fresh basil and dried oregano and cook for about 25-30 minutes stirring occasionally.

B's Spelt Crust Recipe:

Makes one 12" pizza crust.
2 cups spelt flour
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoon baking powder
2/3 water  (or 1/3 water, 1/3 almond milk)
1/4 cups oil plus extra for basting
1 teaspoon of agave
1 teaspoon of rosemary

     Combine dry ingredients in bowl.  Make a well and add wet ingredients. Stir ingredients until dough forms and knead dough for 10 minutes or so until smooth. Dough shouldn't be too sticky. Move dough to pizza stone and roll out. Use a bit of spelt on stone prevent sticking. Once dough is rolled pierce with fork in several places, then lightly brush on olive oil so the dough wont absorb tomato sauce. Add favourite toppings. Pre-heat oven to 425° baking on a stone for approximately 20 minutes. Check after 10 minutes because some ovens cook at different speeds. If using a pan, roll dough out on counter then transfer to a lined or greased pan. Add sauce and toppings. Bake in preheated oven at 200° for about 10 minutes.

5) Pentabike of Satanic Secret Ingredient Vegan Dough Recipe:
(Adapted from The Vegan Table)

1 cup warm water (warm to the touch but not too hot)
1 envelope or 2 1/2 teaspoons active dry yeast
1 tsp sugar/maple syrup/agave
3 1/4 cups whole wheat flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 Tbsp olive/or other oil
2 tbsp cornmeal (reserve for sprinkling)

Pour warm (not hot and not cold) water in a small bowl or cup. Sprinkle in yeast and and stir (gently!) until a beige foam coats the top of the mix, 5-10 mins.

In a separate large bowl, combine dry ingredients except cornmeal. Add yeast mixture and oil then slowly stir and begin to knead for 5-10 mins. If it sticks to your hands, slowly add more flour, 1/4 cup at a time. If dry, slowly add more water, 1/4 cup at a time. Knead the dough out on a flat clean surface with clean hands for 5 mins. Roll into a smooth ball and place back into the large bowl.

Cover it with a dishtowel and place it in a warm spot for 45 minutes two hours, depending on how much time you have.

Roll it out with a rolling pin, improvise if you don't have one, I have used a wine bottle no problem. Rub some oil around on the bottom of your pan, then sprinkle the cornmeal evenly over its surface. Lay your dough out and top the pizza with delicious vegan toppings. Bake until golden brown.
Variations: include 1 tbsp of rosemary/walnuts/pecans/black pepper.

I think this pizza had a bit of everything on it including spicy Parma-Veg.

6.) Sticky Joe's pizza crust  recipe (curiously tastes exactly like my Italian grandma's homemade pizza dough so I am including this one.  She kept her recipes secret so no one has any):

 I'd say the bare bones is just under 4 cups of Tipo 00 flour, three tablespoons of olive oil, pinch of salt, 1 heaping tablespoon of yeast, 1/2 teaspoon of sugar. Dissolve the sugar in a half cup warm water, add yeast, let bubble for 20 minutes. Combine flour salt and oil well. Add yeast and another 1/2 cup of warm water. Mix well. Then it gets sensitive to water. The mixture should be quite dry. Add warm water only about 1/4 cup at a time, and after about 2 of these 1/4 cups, you should get a slightly sticky mixture. Drier doughs don't tends to rise as well, and too sticky is tough to handle. Cover with a cloth for 1+ hours - it should double in size. If you roll it out, try not to use too much flour. Shouldn't be a need to grease or flour the pan. Cook as hot as your oven will go! Make sure to add toppings such as aged prosciutto, spicy sausage, and anchovies! But seriously, experimentation and personal preference are important.

 Yes! Experimentation is important! Try anything!

*Note: Sticky Joe's crust tastes good with veggie pepperoni, green and red peppers, white button mushrooms and Daiya Mozzrella. These were the toppings my Italian Grandma always put on her pizza, well.... except that the Mozzerella was homemade and so was the pepperoni and the peppers were from their garden but this version will do.

7.) B's Rich and Decadent Pizza- The Green Dream; Use Pentabikes dough recipe for this one. Start with pesto (lots of it). Carmelized onions. Roasted red peppers (you can roast in the oven, on the BBQ or buy the ones in the jar.) Crimini mushrooms. Pine Nuts and handfuls of arugula. Put the arugula on top of pizza after it's done cooking. Just let the leaves wilt then drizzle on oil and balsamic vinaigrette. Top with fresh cracked pepper. For an even more decadent pizza add Spicy Italian Tofurkey Sausage.

Nom it!

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